Drunk Dreams

Me and Nathan

     Every now and then I wake up sweating and scared to death because of a dream I had. It doesn't happen all that often anymore, but during my first 6 to 9 months sober, it happened a handful of times. In the dreams I am either drinking, drunk or planning to get drunk. My kids find my stash of vodka and the fear I have of losing my kids is so real. In these dreams I will say things like "what am I doing, I'm never going to see my kids again."

     It seems like I have these dreams during a time when I am feeling so strong in my sobriety. I have no thoughts about alcohol what-so-ever. So why do these dream just come out of nowhere? I think it is God's way of reminding me that it is a continual process. Maybe I am getting too comfortable and the Good Lord does not want me to forget how far I've come and to never go back to that place. While those dreams terrify me and make feel horrible, I have to say a prayer of thanks for the reminder. I am reminded not to forget who is really in control of my life and my sobriety and that is my Heavenly Father. So I am grateful for those drunk dreams.